10 Reasons Not to Have a Staycation with Your Children

Planning a vacation to get away from it from it all is always exciting to do. Mexico, Virgin Islands, Jamaica have all been relaxing places to go to.  Planning fun trips with the kids is a little more work, San Diego, Disneyland, or family visits far away that involve plane rides take a lot of details, more so the younger they are.  When vacation time comes up half the stress of this impending time, which really should be fun, is the anxiety of answering: “What are we going to do?  How are we going to get there?  Do we have the money to do this?" This especially rings true when our daily lives are packed with sports, school, masters programs and advisory positions – what was I thinking? That daily stress is what tricks the average mom into thinking that a staycation would be an answer to a the hassle of having to plan a jam packed wonderful, full of life affirming memories for all the ages vacation.  Instead, you can stay at home, use this time to relax, catch up on that much needed sleep, and those household chores you have been putting off.  You could finish that paper you have been working on in your writing class (wink wink), let the kids catch their breath from all their extra-curricular activities and all the while you could be saving an enormous amount of money! This sounds fantastic right?  But this kind of staycation does NOT exist, not even close.  I am going to give you 10 reasons why you should never, ever plan a staycation with your children.

1. Those images of you sleeping in will not happen.  Your children sense it is their vacation time and will want to get as much awake time out of it as possible and WILL, I repeat, will wake you up a 5:30 in the morning asking for breakfast, to watch a video or for the IPad – the order may vary.

2.  Your children will be bored because all their friends are on cool vacations.  So unless you are o.k. with letting them watch videos, TV., or be on IPads/x-box for the entire vacation your daily mantra will be: Go read a book! How about a puzzle? Let’s go on a hike! How many windows do we have? How many stairs? Let’s do legos! Who wants to go grocery shopping…again?

3.   All of your plans to get caught up on household chores are out the window. (see #2)

4.  All of your good intentions to get your paper done are also never going to happen. (see #2)

5.  Your children will soon tire of all your ideas to keep busy and will begin fighting.  This will begin on day two.  Actual physical fighting may ensue on day 3 depending on the age and size of the child.

6.  You will begin spending money to stop the fighting.  This will be in the form of shopping trips for clothes (but separately) or perhaps movie outings or bowling.  It is important to keep them busy and their minds off the staycation.  Do not give them candy as this only perpetuates the arguing and violence toward each other.

7.  You will be more tired and to the point of exhaustion because of the constant emotional and physical battle that ensues between you and your children.  You will begin to question your sanity.

8.  Your spouse will be of no help to you during this staycation.  Since this is not a vacation they did not take any time off.  Whatever happens during the staycation is entirely up to your expertise and attention.  You are completely ALONE.

9.  Your children and even your pets will sense you are losing your grip on the situation.  The children will ask for more screen time while the pets will scurry for safety into the dark corners of the house.  Your children will slowly turn into lifeless zombies, sucked into the abyss of the virtual world, all because you wanted some time to yourself without fighting, more legos or speaking to and angry 13 year old for just another hour.

10.  You will end up planning a quick vacation that is rushed, therefore not planned well and ultimately doomed.  This vacation will probably will be remembered as the worst vacation in your children’s memories for decades to come.  But you must plan this vacation just so you can reclaim your children from abyss that which you sent them while regaining some sort of sanity of your own.  It would help if your spouse came along and did most of the work while you enjoyed a cocktail or two. 

        Take it from a mom who had the very best intentions to stay at home with her loving family for spring break and on day 2 realized what a heavy mistake I had made.  Thankfully, I called my sister in Montana and I will be taking my boys to visit her family and to the Museum of the Rockies for a few days.  But I leave you with this word of caution – BEWARE – it was almost too late for us, do not submit yourself to this peril as I had; plan your vacations accordingly, as it may save your family’s life.